We were overjoyed when we managed to create an en-suite bathroom in the space under the outdoor staircase that extended into a small room.
Better still it had space enough for a big bath with a shower attachment. We wanted a fitted glass panel to make it all look very nice, but every bathroom store we went to told us the same story. As the bathroom was under the sloping staircase, we’d have to get the glass panels custom made and this would cost us a small fortune. We therefore had the inspired idea to get an adjustable shower curtain that could fit a sloping wall. Shower curtains can sometimes look cheap and nasty so we decided to look for high quality ones in the UK.
Once we’d found the right one the next task was getting curtain rails and we also quickly found good quality rails and packed them up ready for our next trip to Croatia. When we arrived at our lovely holiday home, we were devastated to find that try as hard as we may we just couldn’t get the curtain rails to fit the right height on the sloping wall and Miss E turned to Mr C and said, “this is another fine mess you’ve got us into.”
Ever the optimist Mr C replied, ‘oh well it was only 100 pounds wasted,” to which Miss E narrowed her eyes and cursed under her breath.
It was soon back treading the boards at bathroom stores and contemplating the unthinkable act of forking out an arm and a leg for custom built glass panels, when Mr C had another bright idea. He told Miss E about it and she groaned under her breath again but eventually went along with the idea of getting plexiglass panels cut to size (it seemed a cheaper alternative – at the time).
Our ever resourceful Croatian friend Gordon (who will be dealt with in greater detail in another post) told us where we could get the plexiglass. However, he also gave us a dire warning that the place we had to go to get it was out in the hills and added, “the guy I met up there seems to think there’s still a war in the Balkans and I wouldn’t be surprised if one day he pulled out a kalasnikov and just went berserk“.
Concerned for our lives, we set off for this place in the hills to find a rickety old workshop next to an odd-looking house, and were relieved that the unshaven and disheveled owner wasn’t brandishing a kalasnikov or about to lob a grenade at us when we met him. There was a bit of an edgy atmosphere about him but he also appeared to be in real need of the money, so he quickly took our order then told us to go away and come back tomorrow at the same time.
When we drove up the hill the next day to get our plexiglass, we were pleased that we still couldn’t hear the rat-tat-tat of machine gun fire or the monstrous explosion of grenades or RPG’s going off around us, but instead were swiftly handed our perfectly cut plexiglass, which looked very nice in a smoked brown hue. However, this success and the fact that we’d obtained it with our lives still intact was just the beginning of our troubles.
Resourceful Gordon helped us to fit the plexiglass to our sloping bathroom wall but we couldn’t find any 10 millimeter wide shower door seals to the fit the glass panels anywhere in Croatia. It was back to the UK to get the seals that would fit but then the next problem was transporting them to Croatia undamaged. Inevitably, they arrived at our sunny paradise home bent and buckled out of shape but Mr C is a determined man and never one to allow such minor problems get him down.
He immediately purchased a rotary mini drill set, lots of glue and various solvents and quickly set about fixing the mess.
After about another week of toil and trouble, the glass panels and shower door were fixed in place and looking very professional, especially after Miss E bought some very fancy door hinges, which again Mr C fixed with his mini drill set. Hurrah, but by now there was an overwhelming smell of glue, solvents, burnt plastic and furthermore, newly built bathrooms connected to septic tanks always exude a funny smell at first.
This is when Mr C had the brilliant idea of buying a battery operated air freshener with a sensor.
It seemed like a good idea at the time because whenever someone entered the bathroom there’d be this crick-crick-crick sound and then – pppsssttt, causing a bouquet of flowery fragrances to quickly overwhelm the strange concoction of funny bathroom smells. However, once again things didn’t work out quite according to plan. Don’t get me wrong, at first the pleasant sounds and smells from the sensor airfreshner were comforting and reassuring, as they gradually overpowered the other unwelcome smells with delicate aromas. But we soon realized that there were yet more fiddly DIY jobs needed on the shower door or panels, and soon the thought of hearing that crick-crick-crick-ppsstt sound and flowery smells going off whenever the bathroom door opened, filled us with dread.
Moreover, the light delicate aroma gently wafting by was now more like being in a sinister torture chamber, as the ever increasing flowery fumes made us cough whenever we entered the bathroom. Late that night Mr C had had enough and putting down his tools he resolved not to go back into the bathroom anymore. He feared triggering the sensor again and being finally overpowered by the flowery fumes only to be found by Miss E laid out on the floor.
But just about to go to bed, Mr C realized to his horror that he was going swimming the next day so he’d have to sort out his contact lenses which were in (you’ve guessed it) the bathroom. He’d have to face the sensor one last time when suddenly like a bolt out of the blue it came to him – Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible II – (or was it III), when he’s faced with dozens of laser light sensors which will trigger an alarm at the slightest touch. Trying to remember what Tom Cruise did when confronted with a similar situation gave Mr C a brilliant idea – he’d have to step over the sensor light thereby not activating it as he fiddled around in the dark for his contact lenses.
In the next post Mr C reveals whether his brilliant Mission Impossible idea succeeds.